This week I learned of a crisis in my extended family which reconfirmed to me how vital it is to communicate openly so that we effectively support one another. It is too sensitive to share the details, but I am hopeful that with God’s help it can be worked out. It will take time. Whenever you face a trial always seek to learn from it as you work through it. In this case, I want to touch on the importance of speaking up and listening because they are necessary to get help, resolve conflict, and foster restoration.
Speak Up
When you struggle or are unsure, ask for help. I know it sounds obvious, but sometimes the discomfort and difficulty of being humble and vulnerable prevents you from opening up. I know you may feel ashamed. You may fear being judged or rejected. You may be afraid of the changes you’ll need to make if you get help. All of these are valid feelings. But don’t allow them to be excuses. Ask for help, first from God then from others who are wise and experienced (Philippians 4:6-7). If you have done wrong, confess it to God. Be truthful and transparent. Then receive his forgiveness which he promises to give (1 John 1:9). If you have wronged someone else seek God’s help in making it right.
God created you and loves you. He is always working to bring about the best for your life. He proved this by allowing Jesus, God the Son, to die and rise again on your behalf. Jesus bore God’s wrath for your wrongdoing so you don’t have to. Anyone who trusts Jesus to save them can experience new, abundant life with God now and forever. Only God can take what’s wrong and make it right. Be truthful and transparent. Pour out your heart for he cares for you (1 Peter 5:7). He promises to work all things together for good for those who love him and are called according to his purpose (Romans 8:28). Place your faith in God and he will give you the love, wisdom, power, grace, and guidance to work through your trial. Also in the process he will draw you closer to himself as he transforms your character to become more like his beloved son, Jesus.
Also seek the assistance of godly people. In your life God has or will place wise, experienced, caring people (especially other believers) to support you. Family, friends, pastors, counselors, teachers, coaches, and employers can help you see objectively. They can speak truth into your life, provide practical aid, encourage you, prayerfully intercede for you, and keep you accountable.
Listen
After you speak up about your struggle, sin, or situation, listen and follow through on what you learn. If you trust Jesus to save you, he gives you his Spirit to comfort, convict, counsel, train, and empower you to live rightly. Listen to him. God has also given you his word, the Bible, to be a light to your path in a dark world (Psalm 119:105). “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work” (2 Timothy 3:16). It’s because God’s word is more than printed letters on a page. “For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart” (Hebrews 4:12). Come before God with a tender heart, ready and willing to do what he tells you through his Spirit and his word. Also listen to others, for many times God speaks into your life through them. Just prayerfully confirm that any advice your receive aligns with God’s truth given in his word.
Spiritual Battle
I can’t emphasize enough how important the truth from God’s spirit and his word are. You need to regularly be reading the Bible, prayerfully applying it, and sharing what you learn with others in order to be able to deal with the struggles, sin, and situations you face from day to day. You are in a spiritual battle. God has already won, but you only experience his victory by faith. You must submit your way to his better way. Humbly trust and rely on him then obey what he tells you. This is not a weakness, but a strength. His grace is sufficient for you and his power is made perfect in your weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9-10).
Satan, the devil, doesn’t want you to experience God’s victory. He doesn’t want you to speak up or to listen. He isolates you, tempts you with self indulgence, side-tracks you with self-centeredness, and deceives you with lies that belittle God and exalt you. If self-gratification doesn’t work, he tears you down with anxiety, busyness, weariness, or making you believe you are worthless, guilty, shameful, and hopeless. His deceit and delusions warp your perspective of reality. He is a thief who only steals, kills, and destroys. In contrast, Jesus is the good shepherd who lovingly guides and abundantly provides for his sheep (John 10:1-11).
Listen to Jesus’ voice, not Satan’s. Only Jesus can help you see clearly, think correctly, look beyond yourself, and make wise decisions. Learn to listen by developing a lifestyle that trains you to deal with lies, false teaching, mental health assaults, and spiritual battles. Here are six practical ways. With God’s help, sing his praises and give thanks, study his word, share his truth, serve all people, stand in the gap to intercede in prayer, and stay dependent on God.
Conclusion
Don’t harbor in secrecy and don’t sail in silence. Speak up about your sin, your struggles, and your situations. Seek God’s help first, but talk to others also. Be genuine, truthful, and transparent. Confess any wrongdoing. Receive forgiveness. Then listen to God and the advice he gives through his spirit, his word, and the other people he has placed in your life. God’s desire is to save and restore you. He wants your best which is to be with him, to be like him, and to do what he does. Trust and obey him. Have the same attitude as David, king of Israel who wrote, “How can a young person stay on the path of purity? By living according to your word. I seek you with all my heart; do not let me stray from your commands. I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you. Praise be to you, Lord; teach me your decrees” (Psalm 119:9-12). The apostle Peter encouraged believers, “Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith” (1 Peter 5:6-9). As you speak up and listen you will receive an added blessing, God will work through you to help others. You will become someone they feel safe to confide in and someone worth listening to—who speaks truth into their lives.