This week one of my daughters came home from college to spend the summer. We are all glad to have her back. Over dinner the other night she reflected on her year at school and even shared some memories from her journal. This prompted my son to do the same. In addition to my children, my students have been reminiscing. As part of wrapping up their final year of high school, the seniors who will graduate next week have been writing about whom they are thankful for and what memories from high school stand out for them. It’s important to remember both good times and bad, because the process can help us learn, mature, empathize, and set a course for the future..
Train Memories of Good
On an even deeper level, I’m convinced that the true purpose and greatest value of remembering is to move us into a closer relationship with God. When you recall good and happy times you should attribute them to God’s providence and thank him for those experiences. “Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows” (James 1:17). God not only created and sustains the world, but he is actively and intimately involved in using his divine wisdom, power, and love to save the lost and to care for those who trust and obey him. “God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:8). “The eyes of the Lord range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him” (2 Chronicles 16:9). So with thankfulness view good times through the lens of the gospel, which is the good news that through Jesus, God saves, restores, and blesses all who trust him.
Train Sad and Ugly Memories of Sin
Seeing God’s hand at work and thanking him regarding good times makes sense, but what about bad times? Is there any value in remembering the pain of the past? Yes, there is, if you utilize those memories to point you to God. When you recall ugly and sad times in which you willfully did wrong, made a foolish choice, caused harm, or made a regrettable mistake, don’t let them confine you, define you, or condemn you. That’s the wretched result the devil wants to see happen. He seeks to keep you separated from God in shame and guilt. Wrongdoing should convict you, but not disable or disqualify you from making amends and living rightly in the future. Focus sad and ugly times through the lens of the gospel. Take ownership of your wrong, then take advantage of the salvation God freely offers in Jesus. Jesus is God the Son who became a man to reconcile people with God. He lived a perfect life to show us God. He graciously died an innocent, sacrificial death on our behalf to pay the death penalty for our wrongdoing. He rose again to establish victory over sin and enable all who trust him to live rightly with God now and forever. Therefore, confess any sin and receive God’s forgiveness. “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9). Then move forward with him, relying on his grace and power. Draw your identity and life from Jesus to grow and to bear fruit just as a branch abides in the vine (John 15:1-8).
Train Memories of Bad
I’ve touched on memories of good times and memories of sad, sinful times, but what about bad times which weren’t your fault? How should you treat past events, in which you were an innocent victim of living in a fallen world or when you bore the brunt of broken people’s sin. Once again, view them through the lens of the gospel. As God has forgiven you, so you should forgive others (Matthew 6:15, 18:21-35; Ephesians 4:32; Colossians 3:12-14). That doesn’t mean you forget what happened or what they did. It means that with God’s help you no longer blame them for the harm caused. In the case of an unfortunate event like a natural disaster, where there is no individual responsible, refrain from the temptation to blame God. God is not at fault for not intervening the way you think he should. Although you may not understand his timing and actions, humbly trust that they are governed by his perfect character which is always good, just, and loving. If you can forgive others and trust God, it will free you to heal and grow. Believe that God will redeem bad circumstances, just as he redeems every sinner who turns to him. He promises in all things to work for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose (Romans 8:28).
Additional Practice
If you want to benefit from your memories both good and bad, here are a few additional considerations. Weave reflection into the fabric of your life. Train that reflecting by thanking God for the good memories and trusting him to redeem the bad memories to make you whole and to bring him glory. Take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ. Continually set your mind on things above, not on earthly things (2 Corinthians 10:5; Colossians 3:1-4). Here are three main considerations for doing that.
- Memorialize God’s providence: Journal, paint, draw, craft, dramatize, compose songs, or play music declaring how great God is and what he has done in your life. Commemorate a significant godly event or achievement with a visual reminder like a flag, a sign, a cross, a bookmark, a bumper sticker, or a stone.
- Celebrate God’s providence: Set aside time alone with God to thank him and praise him. Read and meditate on his word, the Bible, to focus your perspective. Gather with others to worship God. Remember God’s gift of salvation in Jesus by taking part in communion. Organize parties to remember life-giving events like Christmas, Easter, and others.
- Share God’s providence: Tell others stories of God working in your life. Proclaim the truth he has taught you. Teach those who listen and train those who respond. Empathize with the suffering of others, comfort them, and point them to God who can meet their needs. Model God’s providence to those around you—his wisdom, power, acceptance, valuing, and love.
Conclusion
Your memories can help you the most, if you desire God to redeem good and bad experiences to draw you closer to him. God is good, powerful, and loving. Commit to the Lord whatever you do (and have done), and he will establish your plans (Proverbs 16:3). Ask God to help you see him at work in your past, present, and future by viewing your memories through the lens of the gospel. He has your best interest in mind and is always at work saving, restoring, and blessing. So don’t lean not on your own flawed and finite understanding, but in all your ways and recollections acknowledge him, and he will direct your paths (Proverbs 3:5-6).